Fear & Loathing

I tried to be more original with the title but the words of Dr. Hunter S. Thompson more or less sum up my feelings about Las Vegas. As my first week of gainful employment comes to a close, I have settled into a kind of uneasy complacency about my fate. One week ago I had packed up some boxes, Google-Mapped a route to Portland via Sun Valley and was set to depart on a month-long road trip through the Great West. Its a confusing feeling to be both crushed and elated at the same time but that's how I felt when Joe "El Pelon" Scallia shook my hand and said "welcome onboard!" after our 5 minute interview had transpired. So close!

Many people have expressed surprise that I am working at a law firm, and, after nearly completing the online application for the position of "Hooters Girl" I'm inclined to agree.

Among my other comical job search efforts:

I applied for a too-good-to-be-true job on Craigslist. $60,000 a year, 4 weeks paid vacation, full medical, and use of a company car just to answer phones and greet clients?!?! How could I go wrong? Well, I learned how about 30 minutes after I sent a lengthy and well thought-out cover letter with my resumé attached. I received a one line reply:

"Would you work topless?"

'Nuff said.

A second demoralizing experience was interviewing for a full-time position making $7-$10/hr as an "Assistant Florist" at Little Chapel of the Flowers and not getting the job. While this stony bitch shot me withering glances, I tried (unsuccessfully) to sell my background in Art History and Visual Art as a helpful aid in creating lovely floral arrangements. As she put it: "When you don't hear from us by Thursday, you'll know to continue your job search." Burn.